Black Friday Survival Guide

Unless you’ve been living under a rock, you are probably well aware of this phenomenon known as “Black Friday”. Today is the day people wait in line to hunt and gather good deals. How does one survive this oft warlike event!? Well, here’s how! (Get ready for some tongue in cheek words to the wise…)

Safety First

(image credit: Toyota)

Nothing is more terrifying than a soccer mom coming at you with a filled-up shopping cart going at least 60 mph. Protect yourself before she wrecks… yourself. Gear up, this is war after all!

Sustenance

(image credit: Business Insider)

If you’re a hard core shopper, you’re probably camping out for the deals. Keep energy and sugar levels up by bringing that leftover turkey carcass with you in line to snack on. Caution: watch out for hungry line neighbors.

Dress for Success

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Leave the ballgown at home today. Speed and agility is all that matters and frivolous accessories need not apply!

Have a Battle Plan

(image credit: PS4 Daily)

Because, they can never take our freedom!! Or our sales away from us. Plan well and strategize.

Fanny Pack

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Get ready to revive the 80s. This look is not exactly high fashion, but who can be bothered with bulky purses on reaping day??

Stay Home

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This one, we can get behind. Leave the madness to the crazies! Opt for a warm fire, cozy pajamas, and a good laptop. Find your deals online and stay alive!

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